Ladies y’all gonna make us lose our mind


25

“No matter what a woman looks like, if she’s confident, she’s sexy” -Paris Hilton 

In my previous blog post (here) I mentioned something about me nearing 30 years of age and still on my graduation course with another 2-3 years left for me as a student. It seems one of my friends who is a girl seems a bit concerned about that. Why? Because she thought just because I said I am nearing my 30s I am like dead close to my 30s, maybe like 28 or 29. But what if I said I’m nearing my 50s does that makes me 49 years of age? And, yes I am nearing my 90s too.


That was just the start.

Then she came down on me like a rapper pointing finger swaying her body like she just don’t care and said, “You are nearing your 30s and still an undergraduate, what the hell happen to you?” I was like this bitch is stuck up man! I tried my best to explain it to her how hard it was during my time to get a seat in a medical college where STs have 5% seat allotment out of the 300+ seats and how lazy I was. Even after a series of self-humiliation, she was nowhere near to understanding! I did the best I could, but she wasn’t really happy with my explanation. So, I told her something she doesn’t know, something that will shut her up, “MBBS entrance exam is the hardest entrance in all professional courses in India” and thank God she gulped it!

After the disarming smile, the highly uncomfortable stretches of silence. I knew she had another deceptively dangerous question no matter how much I tried to explain it to her would come. And, boy! It did come, I thought I was titanium with a layer of bulletproof casting, but the moment she fired away I was shot face down on the ground!

Why must I be in college for another 2-3 years? Why can’t I write a definite year as of 2 years or 3 years? Why, because final year is the hardest/toughest year and most medical students of my type/level get back papers. So, I can’t say with confidence I will not have back papers. That makes me write 2-3 years! Little mouthy bitch!

She actually was advertising terror and bewilderment! Really making me lose my cool! I seriously like I would do to a naughty dog tie a leash around her neck and yank her every time she talked too much! Unfortunately for her, I think her brain was eaten by zombies because that is the only way I can explain the amount of stupidity of all her questions!

Well, that was some sort of argument I had with a good friend, but I know one thing from my experience with a woman. You can’t win an argument over a woman. They save up shit to say, if there is an argument competition in the Olympics men won’t even stand a chance!

Speaking of the not so good qualities (?) of women, I want to add to it another thing that bothers me. Hey you ladies here are all fine, I’m gonna talk about them girls, the other girls!

Have this thing ever happened to you? You can see it this is how confusing it is. This is the practical application of what I am going to talk about.  Like a guy will be out chilling, then a girl walks by and man she looks good, not good in that classical way. I am talking good like she got half her ass hanging out of her skirt, her things are all merging together because of her tight shirt. And, you are like, “Damn look at whore/slut/sex bomb?” The girl will be just mad at you, “Hey you, no no no! Wait a minute, just because I am dressed this way does not make me a whore!” Yes, that is true, gentlemen. Just because they dress certain ways that doesn’t mean they are a certain way, don’t ever forget that! But ladies you must understand that is fucking confusing!

That would be like me Jonathan the medico walking around the street with my apron and stethoscope. Somebody might run up on me, “Thank God, doctor they are over here, they need your help somebody just met an accident” I can be, “Oh! Just because I am dressed this way does not make me a doctor!” You understand what I am saying? Alright ladies, fine! You are not a whore or a slut, but you are on one of those whore uniforms. I will tell you that shit right now. Little misunderstandings can happen.

Why do y’all want to look sexy and shit with your hyper low slung and way tight pants, microminis and short skirts, those shirts that are really just loops of fabric, towering plastic stripper heels (clear heels?) That’s a fancy way to say they wear clothes that showcase their lady lumps: necklines that dip lower than the deepest ocean and heels higher than Mount Everest. Hahaaa..

Women display their assets prominently for the same reason men leave their car keys out in their hand- to flaunt them. Women try to out dress each other and it has nothing to do with the opposite sex. For women, the whole point of dressing sexy is to be the center of attention because all she wants is to get noticed. (WTF?) I say: “You deserve rape.”

For women, being out in public dressing all sexy and wearing a makeup that matches the makeup of a porn star is like being in a beauty contest, except that the Grand Prize isn’t flowers and a sash, its attention domination. In short, dressing sexy is a power play for chicks. Am I right? Maybe! Is this some sort of an arms race amongst the women by exposing their female flesh, and you know we men benefit the most from it, but with a lot of confusion!

You know y’all girls need to get yourself a degree of self-respect.

I mean they don’t grade fathers, but if your daughter is dressing up like one of those you fucked up! You went mighty wrong there somewhere buddy. I am not making fun of them because some of these girls missed a few father-daughter talks or mother-daughter talks. On the other hand, it’s good to see them beautiful sexy girls walking down the street or posting their sexy picture on Facebook because somebody has to take on the monumental responsibility to entertain the single and married man of our society at least by the way they dress. You know your wife will take care of you, but she ain’t gonna entertain you. Do you understand what I mean? Damn!!

(Jorhat, 18th June, 2013)

 

6 thoughts on “Ladies y’all gonna make us lose our mind

    • Oh! Unless you are the type of girls I mention here..
      btw I was in the hospital two weeks ago.. I am on the road to recovery now 😛 Which part of the blog post makes you think I was sick lol.. You are a genius!!
      Peace peace B|

  1. Maybe you should consider re-phasing the line “You deserve to be raped!”. To each his own they say and I can respect your opinion but Nobody deserves to be raped, regardless of what they wear!

    • Oh! Maybe I need to edit this then 😀 Actually it is confusing and some girls yes, if they happen to be what I mention there, I won’t open my mouth in disbelief..
      Thanks again u Zakk

  2. Pretty enjoyable. I too am nearing 90 years of age by adding my 40 or 50 pre-natal years. Had there been no Sayings like “You can’t win an argument over a woman”, you might have easily won the argument over that whining lady. But the knowledge might have held you back. I fully agree with Zakk’s suggestion. And in lines where no culinary idea of ‘fak le dawn’ is invoked, I see some words that almost read like ‘faking’ ……Hoi re, hoi re, ka zam an zal….:) I ziek thiem ie…(y)

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